As bad as it may seem at times for all of the Garden-Variety Poor Bastard in the Kingdom, True Poor Bastards from the exclusive worlds of the glitterati, politics and highfalutin' sports figures suffer from the same burdens as the rest of us Poor Bastards.
The last seven days have been something of a slow week here at The Gazette but as the new week opens we are greeted with the news that the ageless Poor Bastard Brett Favre is at it again. Maybe it's the late spring fever he must feel every year when training camp begins to loom on the summer horizon. Or maybe it's just that this True Poor Bastard is simply unable to quench his desire for constant attention from the pop-culture carnival we call the Mass-Media Circus.
The bigger question is, "who gives a big, fat rat's ass?"
If you haven't had enough of this gator-skinning, Ford truck driving, blue jean salesman then there is simply no hope for your pathetic Poor Bastard soul.
Talk about a True Poor Bastard - Favre could give Charlie Sheen a run for his money as the poster boy for the True Poor Bastard subgenus.
Think about it, here's a guy who had a chance to retire at the very top of his game; at the very top of his profession; at a time when his reputation as one of the greatest player's in the history of the NFL was at its pinnacle....What does he do instead?
He continues to play, posting a sub-par season with a NY Jets franchise which was not likely to make a playoff run; then moves to that indigenous Poor Bastard habitat Minnesota, to play for a team that was ready to make a playoff run; and with this ageless Poor Bastard at the helm they almost make it to the big dance, falling only a few points, and a few completed passes short of making it all the way to the Super Bowl.
Favre was heralded as the next coming all through the Vikings playoff run and well into the off-season which unfortunately seemed to have gone to his head; leading to another indecisive period which continued through the end of training camp in the summer of 2010, at which time this timeless Poor Bastard decides to play one more season.
Fast forward four months and we find that Favre has spent the fall of 2010 being bounced around like a pinball in a well worn 1970's KISS pinball machine. Several concussions and a miserable losing season later he stumbles off the field a beaten man, for what many felt was his last appearance under the big top.
At this point it must be pointed out that Favre's behavior through all of this drama has been nothing short of a classic display of the Poor Bastard's character flaws.
Example: Poor Bastards seem to possess an uncanny ability to turn a good situation bad. Like lemming returning to the sea they just can't seem to keep from self-destructing; especially when the bright lights of stardom are shining down on them. And Favre is no different. Having proven beyond any doubt that he will continue to seek a return to his glory days even it if means becoming a complete embarrassment to himself, his friends, family and fans.
As the month of May begins to dawn and we find ourselves three months away from the start of the NFL preseason who pops up in the news like a hibernating bear who has just been awakened from a winter long slumber?.........
That's right, it's that True Poor Bastard Brett Favre......and what's he talking about today that's newsworthy...?
Well nothing really, but what he is saying is that now he has decided he may want to try being a coach!
See what I mean?.....You just can't keep a True Poor Bastard down!
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