Hang 'Em High Rick Perry Emerges As Leading Presidential Contender...

After years of abuse at the hands of what Mark Twain called the only "distinctly native American criminal class....." in The Kingdom of the Poor Bastard (i.e. Congress); it appears that Poor Bastards throughout the realm have finally had enough!

The Associated Press is reporting that the Congressional Quarterly-Roll Call - which keeps track of such things - has indicated federal lawmakers attended at least 150 fewer town hall meetings over the summer of 2011 than in past years, due to "organized, often raucous confrontations at political events" within their home districts....

Of course followers of The Poor Bastard's Gazette know full well that many of the malingering, criminal misfits we call political leaders are simply too busy out chasing porn stars, whores and strippers, or hustling gay sex partners in airport bathrooms, to be able to bother with attending a face to face meeting with their constituents....
 
And the Degenerate Poor Bastards who aren't out chasing whores and strippers and gay sex partners are most likely sitting in front of a mirror snapping pictures of their congressional wiener so they can share the love with all of their friends and admirers on Facebook, Tweeter and Craigslist!

Meanwhile back at the ranch while nobody was tending the store, we find that something called the "Tea Party" has hijacked the U.S. Congress and in the process destroyed any sense of rational discourse within the political dialogue of The Kingdom!

And with the 2012 Presidential election just over a year away, Poor Bastards throughout the realm recently awoke to learn that the Great State of Texas is once again planning to dump its political garbage on the rest of The Kingdom in the form of current Governor Good-Hair Rick Perry.....

Texas Governor and republican party presidential contender Big Rick Perry is seen here demonstrating how he likes to deal with unruly crowds at town hall meetings...



Although a late-comer to the republican party's efforts to unseat Barack Obla-bla-bama, Big Rick, with his oil-soaked war chest, is now reportedly the front-runner for the GOP nomination, in what appears to be shaping up as a rerun of the meteoric rise of the last Lone Star Gubernatorial Embarrassment in the form of Boy George Bush who, like Big Rick was swept onto The Kingdom's political stage with the help of several hundred million dollars of his Texas cronies filthy lucre...

Big Rick, who has admitted that his idea of fun during his college days at Texas Tech, was setting off M-80 firecrackers under the toilet where his frat buddies were parked for their morning constitutional, is also reported to enjoy going out for a morning jog packing a six-shooter and a can of hairspray to help manage his carefully sculpted coiffure.....

Praise The Lord and Pass The Ammunition....it's going to be quite a ride!